Rollacoaster Sickness

In the words of that awful song sung by the short Irishman, 'Life is a Rollacoaster'...
So whilst I'm getting things in my head sorted, like what i'm doing with life and when I'm doing it, I still wonder why I feel so far from God.
It really struck me the other night in bed that I felt so far away from a relationship with Him. A couple of days before I was fine. It's so much like that at the moment. One day talking to God is easy the next it's like I'm not getting heard or I'm not hearing - a spiritual rollacoaster. Just gotta ride it.
Since I decided not to go along with things just because I've always done them I'm examining things a lot more. Where-as I would have rambled off a prayer or sung any old song now I have to know that I mean it and that God hears it. The amount of lies I've sung about how committed or ready or happy clappy I feel. I have to be real here....
So tommorrow I may be up. Hey, maybe I'll write something a bit more up tommorrow.